Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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