never play flip cup with pint glasses
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
