I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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