I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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