I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
The best revenge is premature balding
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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