How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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