I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
