Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
