Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
