3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
You are a genius and a whore.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
