I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
