Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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