i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
