Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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