i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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