We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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