??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize