All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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