The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Randomize
