The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
