3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
