Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
porn star boner night. come get it.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize
