just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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