come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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