Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize
