Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
