this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
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