I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Small penises have feelings too.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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