I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
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