love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
