Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I need a beard to bite.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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