you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
