shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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