the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Randomize
