So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
