i don't plan on having that self control this summer
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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