don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Randomize
