He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I need help removing her.
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Randomize