omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Even my vagina gasped.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
