Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize