"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Randomize
