Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
