After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
