He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
