you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
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