Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Randomize
