she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
