i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
