You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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