And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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