ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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